RIP RW

Wow.  The death of Robin Williams really knocked me down.  I always thought he was hilarious.  The barrage of jokes and characters and zany action always made me laugh out loud.  His dramatic roles always made me cry and i would listen to his advice in Dead Poets as if it were my dad imparting wisdom.  Reading Quest's instagram about his interaction with him was incredible.  It is that kind of interaction where RW recognized the Roots, knew their names and talked about their music shows us how to be a human being.  You have to recognize people and talk to them.  It simple acknowledgement.  I try to treat people with respect and sometime i fail at it.  I will endeavor to keep trying to be better.

Depression will kick your ass.  it will hold you down, bind your hands and block you from living.  If you need help say something.  If you are sad let someone know and talk.  Also you have to just start doing, little things to medium size action to big steps to leaps forward.  It will help you pull out of the malaise but you have to talk to someone to really address the problems.  Mental health we need more support for it.

It's been a year

I'm Legislative Director again... I wonder if I'll make it back to Deputy Chief of Staff.  I think ocare is going to be a problem.  Being veggie is hard and always escapes me.  Im turning 40 and I hate it.  I've never seen myself married or with kids but also turning 40 makes me...well sad.  Ugh.  Why did I say this out loud?  

Case of the Mundays

It was an uneventful Monday.  I was sitting at my desk, TV on the Daily Rundown on MSNBC, my computer on with my email loading.  This start is the way everyday starts.  Boring-- I know-- but I have to make sure i'm up to speed and ready to tackle any problems.

I click on a message from BGOV.  My breakfast is off to the left and I pick at my eggs and sausage.  The BGOV email is about a new offering to keep Hill staff informed.

"They made a mistake on the BGOV Leadership race summary." I announce to the room.  Im not really expecting a response.

I continue to scroll and read.  There aren't many email specifically for me but there are a ton of news alert emails.  News alert emails are killing newspapers and my attention span.

I grab for my smoothie and shake.  From the corner of my eye I see a flash of blue.  Then the first hit.  Its cold.  As I look left and right the flash of blue becomes an onslaught.  Splash. Splash. Splash in a few seconds i'm covered in smoothie.

I have an 11:00am.

Red Light

It's been a long struggle.  Starting and stopping... a lot...mainly stopping.

I'm going to give it a go again.

I know I don't want to be this size but I can't find away to keep myself on track.  i tried going to the gym early and I have one week of longer days and I stop.  I tried going around 400pm to avoid the rush and that worked for a bit but i just stopped.

For while I find myself able to not drink a soda and then it starts with a diet coke-- coke zero-- 100 cal can of coke-- can of coke-- 20oz bottle and boom i'm stocking 2 litres in house.

Or no soda or sugar drinks and then i get a fresh brewed tea-sans sucre-- and i'm like wow this is great and next thing i know i'm 3 servings in and the last one would make sweet tea a kind description.

or i go and try yoga and its awesome  and spiritual and this is my speed but its way cross town and how do i get ready for work form there and blammo i stop.

The only thing I have really quit was smoking...that took a number of tries and i had to break myself of habit smoking--after eating, stressed at work etc...and well i stopped.  The need for smoking was gone--yes i slip but thats like 1-3 days a year tops.

How do i get to the gym and eat better?

I'm already a gym member at work.  I have to stop soda-- God what kind of crack is this drink!  How to I avoid soda and go to the gym?

I'm writing this because I have disappointed my  mom and my friends too many times.  I'm hoping that by putting it down i see a way forward.

Trust

I trust people.  I like to believe that people will do what's right.

Of course reality hits and i get smacked in the face repeatedly by selfish liars.

I dont know... I miss my friends that i know are true.  I miss those people that you could trust and I knew had my back.

Privacy in the Digital Age

More and more I am concerned with my digital privacy.  Its the civil right issue of our generation. Okay I don't believe any of that.  if you blog, tweet, Facebook, linkedin or social network than you are not concerned with your privacy.  In fact its the opposite of privacy.

Anyway, what would investigators find in my email?

That I Love Brooks Brothers; LL Bean; Patagonia and Filson.

That I am best friends with Barak Obama, Joe Biden, Michelle and Stefanie Cutter.

That my friends are constantly making Spotify Playlists.

I spend way too much money at Amazon buying well everything.

Warby Parker thinks I need to look at the new fall line of glasses in whiskey tortoise shell.

Seamless and Grub Hub would tell you that I eat Chinese food at least twice a week.

AT&T would tell you that Im late on paying my bill.

So boring...God I fell asleep writing that.

Why They Lost?

Fox News and the like minded radio hosts have bamboozled the Republican Party.  Party Leadership just hear the reinforcing nature of these news/entertainment outlets and activist and the faithful take their word as truth.  Instead of looking at the spectrum of news and polls they relied on a narrow view.  A view that said blacks would not come out as strong as in 2008.  A view that attacked women and rape, Benghazi became a conspiracy of cover ups when it was an attack on America.

Pennsylvania was a perfect example.  In the closing days of the campaign it was announced that the Romney/Ryan campaign would go to Pennsylvania.  GOP internals had the state in play.  While every other poll in existence had Obama up 8 points basically from the beginning of the general election to the last week.  There was no downward trend line but the GOP pollsters said they were closing the gap.

I love MSNBC and NPR.  I love Paul Krugman.  But I do not take everything they say as truth.  I want the balance and other side.  I want to make sure before i believe.